Thoughts on 'Thirteen Reasons Why'

Background... I have owned a copy of this book since last Autumn. Long before I had heard about the TV show. It was a gift from an acquaintance of mine. We (she and I) both agreed that it was dubious. Written by a 31 year old man, it is an epistolary ramble through the flawed logic of a suicidal teenage girl. A vindictive burn-book from beyond the grave. Two chapters in, once it was clear where the story was going, I quit reading. I have a 100 page literature rule. If I'm not emotionally invested by page 100 then I stop reading. I didn't make it nearly that far.

But last weekend I made myself watch the show. Because the conversation it is generating is absolutely important. And I wasn't qualified to comment without bearing witness. And on May 15th, I took the book to bed with me and read all night. These are my thoughts.

Things I Learned In June 2016

"I have looked upon all the Universe has to hold of horror, and even the skies of spring and the flowers of summer must ever afterward be poison to me."

H.P. Lovecraft

'The Call of Cthulhu'

July comes in wet, hot, tropical rainstorms. Grey afternoon skies. Whiskey and spices. Banana leaves and old book smells. Deep polished mahogany and crystals. This mermaid life, this jungle life. Vanilla, tobacco and sweet musk. Sandalwood and rum. Moody skies and electric air. Gold glitter on my skin. Perfume and sweat.

Blog-reboot! Things I learned in May!

 "Behind all things are reasons. Reasons can even explain the absurd. Do we have the time to learn the reasons behind the human being's varied behavior? I think not. Some take the time. Are they called detectives? Watch — and see what life teaches."

Log Lady

Things I Learned In April 2016

Oh hi May! I survived another month. The world is full of cherry blossom and the blue sky smells of Spring flowers and rain on hot concrete. Liverpool is waking up and life is fucking awesome.

Ramblings About Recovery, Eating Disorder Stuff and Body Positivity

I struggled to pick a photo for this post. I went with the cute one, because it is my favourite. And the photo that most surprised me. I am amazed by how healthy and happy I look, and also actually am. And, while this guy is most certainly the right one, it is really not about finding the right dude. It's much more about avoiding the wrong dudes. And being your own best girlfriend <3

The Dermatillomania Situation

I'm sitting down to write this post in an effort to break out of a dermatillomania binge my brain and hands seem determined to continue indefinitely this afternoon. I figure it might help to write it out, and typing seems easier than finding my journal right now. Because I just want to stop fucking picking!

Self Care, Rainy Days, Bleeding

This post will contain graphic references to my lady-parts, so reader discretion is advised. It's probably too much information, consider yourselves warned!

It can't rain all the time, but it is raining today. And sometimes all I can do is rest and build a pillow-fort and wait for the sun to shine again. Naps are good. Hugs are awesome. Chocolate is my drug of choice.

Autism, Advocacy and Why I Choose to Share my Stories.

Powerpuff Jane! Going through a bit of a phase with #powerpuffallthethings right now. But she's fierce, made of snark and fire and feels. She has her planner and she is afraid of nothing. And, having pretty much recovered from my broken sternum, and also the copper IUD insertion incident... I figure its time to get back to writing.

Things I Learned in March 2016

In like a lion, out like a lamb. Of the 31 Marches that I have experienced, this one was by far the craziest, most epic, most painful, most pleasurable and most amazing. March 2016... you have been the best month of my life (so far!)

Shit Jane learned this month...

Dublin, March 2016. Blackest Magick In Practice

Oh Dublin, I love you! Yes to more adventures. To sleeping under the stars. To tea on rooftops at sunrise. To soft blankets and hot wet kisses. To life and love and sex and all of the good magic. To freedom and autonomy, of both this girl and this country. To Niko. Family <3.

Ramblings on Self Love, Social Media, and Pizza

At 31 I finally learned how to love my body completely. After a lifetime of eating disorder issues, various self-injuries, all of the scars, both physical and emotional, both deliberately inflicted and accidental. In this moment, somehow, all of the aspects of my self come together and I love all that I am. Perfectly imperfect.

The Feedback-Scarred, Devotionless

This mermaid life. This silent Heaven. This scorched earth Afterworld where there are no limits, no rules, no Gods, no Monsters.

Things I Learned in February 2016

I like Leap Years! It's basically a bonus day! I spent most of mine napping and trying to catch up on crafty projects :)

And Guinness for the Lads

Finding My Happy

On celebrating holidays and embracing the little pops of peace and happiness wherever and whenever I find them. And chickens. Lots and lots of chickens!

Luna

"I did die, I've been on the moon. And I know you died, because you were there too. Are you an angel?"

Trial By Fire

Or, what happens when a 31 year old autistic chick finds herself living alone for the first time ever.

Rose Quartz and Serenity

The skies of late January. Quiet and full of magic. The day I took this photo I had been haunted by my lover's shadow. Some days it's like that. I see him everywhere. All of the places were we once stood together, charged with ghosts of past conversations.

Things I Learned In January, 2016

Only a day late this time ;) Determined to continue with the learning and sharing. Remembering how much the Bear appreciated these little peeks into my consciousness.

"The wind She whispers through the graveyard of our hearts....

Wreath in dreams as She weaves Her witchcraft

We breath enamored of the conquering Dark..."